Ask Dr. Andy

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From time to time, as a public service, we here at The Loafer like to take some of your pressing questions and ask them to our foremost expert, Dr. Andy. The mailbag has been overflowing with questions lately, and we felt the time was right for some responses. As always, we wish to remind you that Dr. Andy is not an actual doctor, though he does DVR General Hospital, and watch it every night before going to bed. And now, Ask Dr. Andy.

Dear Dr. Andy,

This summer my wife and I have been having a terrible time with bugs and pests appearing in our home. We try to get chemicals out of our house as much as possible, and we figured we'd write you and ask if you knew of any natural repellants that might provide us with some relief. Sleeping at night has become quite difficult due to the frequency of mosquitos in our bedroom.

Best,
Ronald P. Jumpsmith

Dear Mr. Jumpsmith,

Indeed I do know of some all natural pest control that you may mix up at home. Did you know that making a paste out of two parts of cream cheese to one part of black pepper and one part of cinnamon makes for a good pest repellant? It either repels pests or attracts racoons, can't remember which one. Either way, you try it and let me know what happens.

Dr. Andy,

My husband has been watching many of those antique hunter television programs. As a result, he's begun going around the area and “picking” the best items that he feels he can restore and resale for higher value. I've tried numerous times to tell him this is all folly, but he doesn't seem to listen to me. This “hobby” of his has taken over the garage, and is slowly creeping its way into the house. Is there any way I could possibly get through to him?

Concerned,
Susan Widewith

Dear Mrs. Widewith,

When ones spouse has taken up a hobby that the other finds infuriating, it can be difficult to have a frank discussion about it without seeming hostile. I'd suggest sitting down and having a frank, but open conversation with your husband about this. I'm sure once you both discuss it together aloud, you'll find common ground. If that doesn't work, just shake the ever loving hell out of him till he comes around.

Dear Dr. Andy,

I'm an elderly woman who doesn't enjoy sex.


 I'm afraid this is all the time we have for now, hopefully before too long I'll be able to take the time to answer more of your pressing questions. Keep sending those cards and letters.

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